Tired. So very, very tired. This is the worst time of year for me, the last few weeks of winter that seem to last forever. By this time I’ve almost had it with being indoors. I’m a child of the summer, of bare feet and warm breezes and green things. I’m a child of gardens and picnics and barbecues; of hazy, humid summer nights lit up with fireflies. Every year as the end of February approaches I become more and more restless, resentful, and bad-tempered. I’m literally aching to get outside, to work until my fingernails are ragged and dirty, and the air around me is filled with the sound of bees buzzing and the lazy, sensual smells of jasmine. I’m out of sorts, and anxious. Spring just can’t get here fast enough.
Saturday was nice. We woke up early, packed a spartan lunch and headed out to Arcadia. The morning was spent cleaning and packing while the LOML installed a plywood subfloor in one of the bedrooms. Due to the recent (unending) rains, the outside areas were literal bogs, but bogs make for very easy fence post removal, so the afternoon was spent pulling up old rusted fencing and cleaning up debris from recent storms. At one point I took down a sign I’d put up last year to find an adorable little bat curled up, half-asleep and clinging to the wall. I was very excited, as we’ve been talking about installing bat houses on the property to invite a few to live there and eat the host of mosquitos that swarm throughout the summer. The LOML softly reinstalled the sign without disturbing him. All over the yard he spring bulbs were blooming en mass, and I couldn’t resist taking a giant bouquet of daffodils, narcissus, and camellia japonica home so that, for a few days at least, I could close my eyes and pretend I was there again. Good dreams that night.
This week stretches out before me into a jumble of medical checkups, car maintenance, vet appointments, and homework. Not even sure if I’ll get to write. Supposed to be cold and rainy a good part of the time. I’m despairing and longing for Spring. Just a few more weeks, I keep saying to myself. Just a few more weeks.